b'POACHING CONSEQUENCESYOURE NICKED! In this third instalment about slingshots and the law, we examine the consequences of poaching and getting caught doing it. A cautionary taleA s editor of a magazine about catapults, I realise thatdo need hard evidence that the ones in the boot were not just many of my readers are misbehaving by clear intent.picked-up roadkill like Muggins had said. Lots of no-comment Just like car nutter magazines, they are readersin interview.because of their naughty urges. For speeding or forEarlier we had said we were lost, and that the catapults they stealing a few of his lordships pheasants. found were all about a tournament we were all going to and that We are also entertained by the old tales of poachers and thewe didnt realise that picking up roadkill was illegal. We lucked folk songs about them, so it seems glamourous. Bill Bobmanout and got an NFA on the poaching- no further action - but we in the Brendon Chase book was a source of old countrywere cuffed for hours before we got processed into cells and it knowledge rather than a villain. was 6am when we were released. The 150 car pound fee was But this is the 21st Century and rural crime is being crackeddue, though. I let Muggins pay.down upon heavily. From hunt saboteurs in cheap 4x4s drivenThe game laws date from 1831 but the 21st Century has by crusties with a rebellious farmers daughter wearing Barbouradded cars. For turbo-nutters and rural crims alike, the sat next to them, to those running dogsthreshold for your car being taken away and crushed is ONE to hares (coursing long since banned) and to those poachingconviction for use-in-crime such as poaching and three-times-game. and-you-are out for antisocial use of your vehicle to cause fear, With details fudged to protect the less than innocent,distress and alarm. Like a loud stereo or doing donuts in Tescos Slingshot World interviews an actual, police-experiencedcar park.poacher. Well, he was after this. Despite YouTubes nonsense with a voice blithering Im normally well more careful but my man Muggins says toshotonpermissioninseason just zackly like they were magical come visit and how he knew a sure-fire spot for getting somewords, shooting anything from a vehicle is illegal as hell. They birds from the car. Turns out he has a day out in mind with twotake your car, crush it and slap you a minimum three month more mates. Shorter version - day dawns and we drive off to go get some.We gave up on one place because of too many peopleLads, were fucked! around on the lanes and Muggins says he has another killer spot. Only its a bit too on-top for my liking. Looks a bit close to a house thatd be a keepers by my reckoning. A few shots across the gate a bit too close to the house, (any house) and I am not happy and say we have to go. But it gets worse. Muggins tells us about how he and some rascals walked into the estate, into the release pen and how easy it all was. I was giving it large on the WTF front but he was doing it anyway and pointed the car up a single track dead end lane.I was proper unhappy now and lost it - made him turn around. We already had two pheasants in the back, under a coat and this felt against my every poachers instinct. I was right, because driving up the lane, blocking it ahead, was a sodding great 4x4 pickup truck. I said, Lads, were fucked!There was no possible escape apart from on foot. But we hadnt even got out of the car. Just as well because the keeper got out, followed by his even-angrier-than-him wife, their grown up son and two bloody huge dogs. I think we would have been savaged if we had run. Keeper man demanded to know what we were doing there, after assuring us that his dogs would rip our faces off.Thinking fast, Muggins said that we were looking for somewhere to smoke weed. Show me the weed! only we couldnt as none of us even smoke it. I prefer a beer. Mrs.driving ban. Even passengers driving licences get a ban.Keeper had called the feds and we had no choice. Two policePoole Magistrates Court convicted pheasant catapult cars arrived. Then a little later, two meat wagons and a carpoachers and fined the driver a total of 845 in four parts and carrier. They were not messing around. I didnt know butcrushed this muddy Vitara. The passengers each got 550 fines.Muggins, had fractured the occasional law in the past and had aNot worth it, in many ways, especially as you will burn more record. I wasnt surprised. There was LOADS of coppers. in fuel than the price of a brace in a game dealers. Check out Long story short, it is really hard to get a nick on theissue two if you have not yet, for a form to use when seeking pheasants, as we leave no lead in them for forensics and theyproper shooting permission.012SlingshotWorld012_SSW002.thelaw.indd 12 05/09/2019 15:04'